What defines a real friendship?
It is very easy to call a person "friend" when times are good and two people are on the same page, but what about the tough times when your companion does not agree with your thoughts and is NOT on the same page you are? Most healthy people (by this I mean with a healthy self esteem) are able to see that it's ok to have ones own opinions on things. That not everyone will see things one way.
I think a true frienship can be easily defined by how willing we are to remain friends THROUGH our hardest times and in spite of everything come out on the other side knowing we are BOTH better for it. To know that the trials we have walked through have brought us closer and allowed us another glimpse of the one we call friend.
Honesty is another BIG thing for me, if I cannot trust that a person is honest, then I will never feel comfortable enough around them to open up. Finally there is Loyalty, something that is not easy to come by. Loyalty to me, means that if one does make a mistake they will be foregiven entirely. The other side to that is, doing our best NOT to do anything that may be seen as unloyal or selfish.
Friendship is a give, give relationship, as corny as that may sound. If one person takes only, then the other is depleted and this continues until neither is very happy with the other. This type of "Friendship" will certainly either wither untill it's nonexistant or will end badly. Using another for one's own betterment is NOT a good definiton of a friend, no one WANTS to be a pawn.
Saturday, May 21, 2005
Monday, May 16, 2005
I have found myself lately, really studying people that surround my life, chatters included. The number of people incapable of thinking past their own wants and needs is astounding to me, that they can live their lives so completely without thought for others. When does a person become like that? Is it something learned or is it inherent? Why is it not, just as easy for people to be kind? Has everyone forgotten how?
Two hundred years ago, society was not like it is today, people helped each other, cared and watched out for one another. Parents raised their kids, taught them by setting a good example and by being consistent and not ballistic with them. Neighbors spent time watching out for each other and not fighting. Life was a wonderful high all on it's own, there was no use for poisons we put into our bodies everyday now. What caused this change through time? More importantly, can it be stopped or at least slowed.
Two hundred years ago when you called a person your friend, you had faith in that person and trust. Now "trust" is a very rare and special gift, not often found or kept. People are so interested in what is best for themselves that they don't take the time to SEE anyone around them, nor do they see how much they are hurting others. They charge into a situation with one thought in mind...ME!
Moreover, they will use anyone they can if they feel it furthers their own cause. How sad not to look around and think: What can I do to brighten someone’s day today? To think beyond ones self and reach out is probably one of our greatest gifts, so, what have so many done with theirs. What happened to the days of community and commitment to bettering humanity and constantly striving to better our selves.
Posted by Scarlett at 6:51 AM